Not Sure Yet. Maybe Next Week?

So here we are. If only I knew where that was. Or do I mean where that were? And even if I do (did?), you might reasonably ask why I bother. Oh, this post isn’t about a new release.  If you were wondering. Instead…

WARNING: This is a nuts-and-bolts kind of post, or it would be if nuts and bolts had a tendency to hang up in mid-air, and it’s very likely dealing with a bunch of goofy and unrealistic expectations. And badly at that. Read at your own risk. Or, if possible, have your computer read it to you. That would be at least semi-appropriate.

Lots of goals going on in my neck of the woods. Lots of aspirations. Lots of hoping. Mainly, though, I just want to make sense. And it’s harder than you might think–though of course that may be a result of a peculiar mind. Meaning, of course, mine. ’Cause frankly I can’t tell what’s what anymore.

Here are the issues I’m currently allowing to take over said brain:

• I want to write new fiction on a regular basis.
• I want to learn to dictate that fiction.
• I want to dictate that fiction remotely, without being remotely near a computer.
• I want to use software for transcription–meaning that I don’t want to have to hire or train someone to transcribe my dictation.

Frankly I may have bitten off more than I can chew. I am dictating this, right now. But…I’m having trouble with the dictating-new-fiction bit. It works, but it’s very slow. And even making the attempt may well be flying in the face of lessons I would like to think I’ve learned about writing fiction. To wit:

• I generate fiction much more quickly when I don’t stop to edit as I go. Weird tricks such as unreadable fonts and an audibly ticking timer encourage me to rush forward.
• I seem to generate better fiction when I write more quickly. I’m constantly amazed at how few typos I create. And the story moves quickly, in more than one sense,  possibly because I’m focusing on just that: the story. Rather than the words or other odd characters (?) thereof.
• Dean Wesley Smith, among others, writes about the creative mind versus the critical mind. The idea seems to be that we can operate either one way, or the other.  Thus, we shouldst not mix our editing-crap activities with our writing-crap mission. All of my experimenting thus far seems to back this up.

So…what’s the problem? Here it is: as I dictate, I have to verbalize punctuation marks. Hmm.

Okay, that was fun to say (rather than type, and how’s this for a bit of extraneous punctuation?), but there may actually be something worse than the obvious awkwardness involved here. Verbalizing punctuation, and thus visualizing individual sentences, definitely slows me down, which is at least a mild problem. But it may be that even thinking about punctuation interrupts the creative flow–which, yeah, it clearly does–but in a way that is not actually amenable to training.

For contrast: when I blindly type a story, as quickly as I can, I’m not thinking about sentences at all. I’m thinking about the story. About what’s happening at the moment, and what might be happening next. So…clearly this means my fingers are well-trained to manage the details for me. I am therefore considering two possibilities:

1. This (by which I mean dictating sentences, punctuation and all) is a new skill, and it will take time to learn to do it well.
2. All this fussing with the details of punctuation means what I’m trying to do is fundamentally stupid, and I should therefore quit messing with it as soon as possible.

I guess a reasonable person might at this point ask: what’s the point? Why even bother with all this? And I’m not sure I have a good answer.

I really, really want to teach myself to write fiction in some setting other than sitting at my desk. I love the idea of wandering down a trail and muttering into a microphone. But does this make sense at all? Wouldn’t learning to dictate while hiking be yet another new skill?  And don’t I live in a freaking rain forest? So…what kind of equipment do I expect to use, exactly?  A waterproof microphone? Plus a waterproof recorder? Am I in fact doing this only for the new-toy factor? Because: yes…I’m like that. Sometimes.

FWIW, I have figured some of this out. I use an Android tablet rather than a dedicated recorder. I use software called “DictaDroid,” after experimenting with approximately 10 alternatives. I use a Plantronics USB headset. When I dictate as I stand at the large-type (?) computer, the transcription software works very very well. It’s getting a lot better at transcribing my recordings too. But the limiting factor doesn’t appear to be hardware or software except in the sense that software doesn’t usefully handle punctuation for me–the problem is me.

And it’s extraordinarily stupid of me to let this become an issue just now. For Crom’s sake, I only recently figured out how to write new fiction, both quickly and regularly. Or, actually, either. It’s a mind-blowing level of success. And yet I’m messing with it. Instead of using it.

Yes, I got sick and the fever did strange things to my mind. But no, I don’t have a fever now. Except metaphorically.

Am I asking too much, not only of myself but also of the world of possibilities? Am I essentially being a spoiled brat? Is it just that proceeding to write normally is too much like, for God’s sake, work? Maybe so.

OTOH, if this works…well, maybe I’ll be very happy. Or maybe I’ll use it as an excuse to go off on another ridiculous adventure of some sort. Maybe this sort of reality-denying behavior is endemic to writers of fiction.

Beats me, folks. I’m giving myself through Friday of this week to figure it out. We’ll see how it goes.

Meanwhile, have fun out there. Or else I may punctuate you unmercifully.